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random thoughts about life and love :)
*actually just a summary of a day in the life of ME!* | ||||||
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:: Wednesday, February 18, 2004 :: yay i got into college!! when i got deferred from BU i decided that i did'nt like it anymore (even though, secretly, it is like the love of my life)...so i applied early decision to the george washington university...and i got in!! omg i am so excited...it was my 2nd choice and its pretty hard to get into also.. (its rated like a 91 out of 100 for difficulty of getting in at princetonreview.com) so i feel very proud of myself :).. but now my parents are flipping out cause it costs 39,000 a year, and we applied for financial aid and they gave us back our estimated family contribution of $38,000!!! so that means they are willing to give us like 1,000 dollars in fin aid!! and we aren't by any means rich! it sucks....but then i guess my parents filed their taxes last night and now it's saying that we have to pay 21,000...so its' down a little.....but..ugh...my parents say they "aren't willing to sacrifice" their lives for me to go to college..blah blah blah..anyway...omg i am really excited for senior year to be over ad to go to college!! ahahahha!! lol..... hmm what else is new?....i have been working a LOT on my health fair..it's looking good..it is on march 22 and i have 16 guests coming as of right now...(my goal was 10) so i'm good... its very very stressful but it's coming along..:: Tuesday, January 20, 2004 :: wow i haven't written in here in forever..ugh..well lets see...i am COMPLETELY stressed out and ready for high school to be over...too much homework, senior project is killing me, college.....dont even get me started...blah blah blah....i got deferred from my one true love--that is, boston university...ahhhhhhhhhh i love that fucking school but oh well...thats life....i also got deferred from tulane university---my SAFETY fucking school...wow i suck...i work my ass off for 4 years and what do i get?? nothing... well i guess i still have another chance at both.. hmm...anyway...i've gained like 10 pounds from the holidays and i am fat so i feel like shit about myself...but thats ok lol.....wow..this is depressing why did i even start writing in here???:: Wednesday, August 13, 2003 :: i miss my christopher!!!!!! waaa.. this sucks..all i have been doing is work!! and usually all i am ever doing is chris!! haha just kidding lmao...still..this sucks alot... :( i am lonely and tired but i have tomororw off thank god..and he is supposed to come home friday supposedly...hmm.. on friday i have to go to staples in danbury to get trained on the register..joy..lol..and for all of you that wanna know-- staples should be open on sunday hah...now i am advertising for them...well it is my mom's bday so i am going to go eat cake :):: Friday, August 08, 2003 :: well i started my new job at staples the other day...its not bad..i like it actually..its fun since the store isn't open yet so we are just stocking shelves and all that fun stuff...i like most of hte people there too...they are mostly all young people...its fun..but it suckls cause i have to work soo much ..i've been working 9-5 every day so far..and next week i am scheduled to work 40 hours..which is like a fulltime job...9-5 every day except thursday..sucks!! but lots of money :) ..hehe.. i am soo excited caues i need to go shopping.. oh well tomorrow i am goin to ny to some fair with a bunch of my family that lives there...interesting.. i have tomororw and sunday off yyes!! lol..:: Monday, August 04, 2003 :: well today i went to teh school to talk to mr. teravainen but of course he wasn't there...so i have an appt with him near the end of august... then i went over to lindsay's house and we just sat around and talked and then when i was going home it was raining soooo hard..it was scary..for like 5 minutes i couldn't see anything!1 it was really scary driving in it..hmm..then i came home and went out for ice cream with my mom and brother...and i saw theresa there with her family... and i heard that josh and jenny's dad died today of a heart condition or something... i feel really bad...i don't know any of them or anything but i can't imagine.. (and i'm not even close to my dad at all!)...and today is tyler's bday.. i wonder how his family is doing.. they are moving soon i think...i've seen them packing their car up alot and mrs. horrigan called my mom the other day about having a tag sale or something in the neighborhood... i dont want the horrigans to move!! it's sad..theyve like been my neighbors forever , not really but it is going to be really weird without them around... ..hmm...:: Saturday, August 02, 2003 :: ugh i'm bored..i don't even have anything to say on here i just have nothing else better to do then write :)...I fucking miss my boyfriend!!!!! and lindsay is on vacation so i have no one to do things with or talk to since they are basically the only people i ever hang out with/talk to.....lol...yeah i'm a loser i know..hehe...well anyway...angela if you are reading this--do you remember josh onlien??? from a really really long time ago when i used to talk to him and i would tell u about him?? lmao...well today i went on another sn and he imed me! lmao i haven't talked to him in like 3 years..it's hilarious.....hah oh and if you are reading this--are you going tot hat ya meeting on the 5th?? tell me if u are lol maybe we could carpool or something..ugh i'm sooooo bored and tomrorow i have to go to a family picnic thing in upstate ny..HA! my favorite place in the world..(yea right) i hate it there sooooooooo much ...but o well..anything that will take my mind off of missing chris :)...lol...:: Wednesday, July 30, 2003 :: ugh... chris left this morning for vacation :( and now i wont see him for 2 weeks and i probably wont talk to him either since he is going to be driving around alot... :'( waaaaaaaaaaaaaa... anyway-- i got the job at staples..i FINALLY have a job!! i'm sure everyone is very proud of me.. heh......i start on the 6th of august even though they aren't opening then.. i went to look at Fordham University yesterday and we got to the information session and i was like.. um no i am not going here so we left when everyone else went on the tour lol...it's like a really really religious school and you have to take theology courses while you are there adn all of that...and that is very much not me..i 'm not into that at all... so my mom was pissed cause i didn't figure that out before she took the day off of work to drive there for an hour lol....so now i have to really research some schools to go look at..adn my dad is an asshole cause everytime i bring up school hes either like "i can't afford to pay for it.." so i am paying for my own college..and then the other day i was like 'i want to go look at univ. or RI" and he was like "i'm not throwing away my money to send you to some party school" and i was like 'um i am paying for my own college so i can go wherever the hell i want thank you very much' and i was like 'dad.....there is like a party every weekend at shepaug and i have yet to go to one of them' and hes like 'yeah well things change in college' like he doesn't trust me or somtehing.....fucking asshole i hate him... and anytime i tell him or talk to him about where i want to go he's like ''your motives are all wrong ' like i dont know what i want and..ughhhhh i could go on forever.....i am just not going tot ell him where i get in until the day i leave for college and then i'll be like "bye " lol.....ughhh... hmm not much else is new...:: Sunday, July 27, 2003 :: well i just got back from marthas vineyard...it wasn't as bad as i thought it would be lol i actually had alot of fun despite the fact that my family is retarded and for the most part i hate spending time with them except my mom lol...but we went shopping alot and to the beach and i got pretty tan...i got anew skirt, a cool purple watch and a sweatshirt and my parents finally agreed that i can get a belly button ring!!!!!!! i'm really excited..oh and tomorrow i have a job interview at staples...so i am havin fun ...now i am just sitting around reallllllly hot and my family is unpacking lol while i'm on the computer hoping that chris comes over :( and chris is going on vacation in like 2 days and his parents said i could go with him too but i dont think i can cause i will prob have to work...but anyway i'll ask him tomorrow when i go...and also we have a stupid youth leadership meeting sometime during those 2 weeks he'll be gone that i have to go to (angela haha) my mom is forcing me cause i didn't go to the last bike day thing cause i got really sick the night before and had to call him that day and say i couldn't go...and when i talked to giles he said that the next meeting i think it is aug. 5 or something..is really important according to him......so my mom is like 'you have to go' but i might try to get out of it if i dont have to work till after we get back....anyway...i'm going to bed i think cause i have to be at staples at 9 and i'm SOOOOOO tired right now my famiyl gets up at the crack of dawn every morning on vacation with some adventure to do haha...:: Saturday, July 19, 2003 :: yesterday i visited northeastern university...and i really liked it so that's good..i'm excited cause it's a safety school for me...and today i was supposed to go to a youth leadership activity but i was really sick this morning so i didn't..and tomorrow i am leaving for vacation :(:: Wednesday, July 16, 2003 :: wellllll.... hmm what is there to say in here? lol....i applied for a job at staple and i really REALLY hope i get a job there..and i volunteered at the hospital and i volunteered at habitat for humanity last saturday also..so i am getting lots of community service hours which i'm happy about...today i need to call this lady about an internship at the hospital in the fall and i'm excited about that too....hmm...last night me and chris went to ruby tuesday for dinner and then we were going to see legally blonde 2 but we decided to just rent movies instead and go to my house...so we watched Just Married and Punch Drunk Love... they were good..but somewhere in the middle i started flipping out on him lol (pms)....he was like... "now that i just took you to a nice dinner and you are beautiful, can we fool around?" and i just got sooooo pissed lol....and so we got in a fight (actually it was just me mad)..and i started crying and hes' like "it was just a joke.. " and then it went into a bunch of other issues that have been going on between us...cause i had told him the other day that it pisses me off when he says that or does that because he makes it seem like that is all he cares about..and its not the point that that was just a joke..its just the fact that heknows that that makes me upset... he knows that very well and still jokes with it.. and ugh things have just not been good between us lately....something is missing and i'm not sure what it is...it's like our relationship is slowly dieing or something... i dont know we have communication issues lol.....so hopefully that will get resolved...:: Monday, July 14, 2003 :: ugh yesterday i had the worst cramps in the world.. usually i can take 2 excederin and they go away....but yesterday i took 4 and they were still like completely horrible i was about to die..i could hardly move and i'm like in the bathroom screaming for my mom to go get me some midol and so i'm lying on the couch waiting for her to come home and chris comes over ha..i was like.....omigod i am going to kill you...but then i felt better once i took the medicine thank god ..i seriously thuoght i was going to have to go to the hospital or something...lol..well today i am going to the hospital to do some volunteering in a little while then i am going to staples to try to get a job.. i went in there the other day and they said i could come back today and apply on the computer thing there so i'm excited....:: Sunday, July 06, 2003 :: well i hope everyone had a great 4th of july ;)..i sure did!!....me and chris got chinese food for dinner adn then went to mike mcgordys party thing and parked there and walked to the fireworks at shepaug and it was alot of fun :) ....and then today i worked at a 4th of july party in bridgewater...huge party w/fireworks better than shepaug's lol...these people are sooooo rich....they had 300 guests that i had to servelol...ugh i am soooooo tired and my arms i can barely move...but i am too hyped up on caffeine to get any sleep..even though its 2 am lol..it was fun though and i got paid generously hehehe...ugh ..however, i have come to the conclusion that i hate working w/girls..i despise girls lmao....they're just so...............bitchy, moody, and they all think they're better than everyone else.i hate working w/them...i got along w/all the guys working there bussing /waiting w/me but the damn girls...i hate them!!!!!! lmao..its true..girls are just so competitive and so i dont know....lol ughhhhhhhhh....anyway...i really want to go to manhattan next week sometime for the day to go shopping...alone ..lol....i'm excited ..cause i really need/want new clothes! hmm..hopefully i will plan something sometime soon......okk well i suppose i should try to get some sleep even though i am wide awake....:: Tuesday, July 01, 2003 :: well hmm what did i do today? well i woke up at around 11:30 and then i went out to lunch with tracy at around 1:30 to chinese food!! yumm!! even though i only like 1 type of chinese food, i still love going..hehe....then...i got yelled at by my parents cause they came home from work all pissy and apparently the car that i ususally drive almost blew up adn needed over $400 in repairs...soo i got yelled at, because of course it is my fault that shit hit the fan with the car..even though i dont know anything about cars...its still my fault of course....and then my dad was just really really pissy and he started screaming at me and my brother for stupid things...like for example...i had my towel in the computer room cause my dad was taking a shower in the upstairs bathroom, and so i coudln't go put it in the bathroom right then...well he came out and started flipping out on me cause i had the towel in the computer room.ughhhhhhhh he is a fucking jerk i can't stand him...oh well i'll be gone soon...thank god...haha..and then we went and picked up the car, and my dad was in agood mood then, surprisingly and he gave me money to fill the car up with gas...and then i went and visited chris at work and he told me he was going to kill greg (because he has a baseball game against bristol tonight or something and greg is a pitcher on their baseball team who likes me for those of you who don't know)...and its dumb cause knowing him he probabyl will say somethign obnoxious to greg...oh well...lol...then i went to blockbuster and returned a movie adn got "how to lose a guy in 10 days" so i am gonna watch that tonight...then i came home and made pasta for dinner and ate it and now i am bored and talking to nicole online doing absolutely nothing cause i am extremely bored. that was my day in a nutshell haha..for those of you who actually care.:: Monday, June 30, 2003 :: ugh this sucks!!! i can't believe i went down on my SATs..omigod i am so pissed off i can't believe it.. I thought this one seemed easier..this sucks so much for me, although most people might consider what i got the first time a good score, i dont think it is...for the colleges i want to go to , the average is a lot higher than what i am getting...i dont know what i am going to do cause i have my heart set on 2 colleges that i will probably never be able to get into now.. :( ugh...i'm so bored too.. i don't know what to do with myself..no one is around..my family went camping in rhode island or something last night and tonight i guess..so i dont know what to do..i am trying to see if tracy wants to do something tonight but she is not responding lol...ughhhhh oh well waaaaaaaa i did bad on my sats..this sucks i went down like 50 points...damnit i thought this one was easier too...might as well kill myself:: Saturday, June 28, 2003 :: oo i had a really good day today...this morning chris woke me up and we went to steep rock on a picnic and ate french toast :)!! hehe....then he went to work, and i went home and lyed in the sun and then later on i went out on the boat w/my family and just sat around on the lake..that was nice...then i came home, and the downfall of my night-haha..i really really wanted to go to the mall cause my grandparents gave me money for my report card...(ooo i got all A's and an A+ on my trig exam, and a..............A+ on my spanish 6 exam!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it was sooooooo hard i thinks he had to have mixed my grades up w/someoen elses, or i must have had good luck)...and so i wanted to go to the mall, but earlier in the day my car almost blew up haha..and it overheated so i can't drive it for 2 days...so i wanted chris to drive me but his mother wouldn't let him..so i got pissed..so we went to Eleni's for dinner instead..that was fun anyway..then we went to victorias secret and gap in souhbury but both were closed :( and i got pissed again cause i realyl wanted to buy new clothes... and now SAT scores are mailed monday (eek)..lol...but....i'm hoping (knock on wood lol) that i did really well since i thought i failed my spanish, and trig exam but ended up getting an A+ on both..so i'm hoping maybe i had good luck on my SATs but i doubt it hehe...oh well i'm goin to bed..goodnight!!:: Thursday, June 26, 2003 :: once again, it is sooo hot...i feel like i'm about to die... ugh it's 4:00 and i haven't taken a shower yet cause i'm too lazy and too hot...i am sooo bored...i think i'll probably just end up watching a movie by myself tonight...tomrorow i start my volunteer job at the hospital in the morning...i'm kinda scared...oh well it shouldn't be too bad tomorrow anyway since i'm being trained... hmm my mom just went to costco and i am hoping that when she comes back she brings yummy popsicle things that i told her to buy back for me!!.. ugh last night i got no sleep..i ended up actually falling asleep at 3:30..and then chris came over early this morning and woke me up at like 9:30... i'm not actually that tired though surprisingly...oh well i'm sure i will be tomorrow when i have to get up early and go to the hospital.:: Wednesday, June 25, 2003 :: ugh its so hot...i guess i shouldn't be complaining though, the heat is better than a cold, rainy summer..i got my senior pictures taken yesterday and my mom is pissed cause she didn't look at the prices until after i guess...and he took like 200 pictures of me and then the packages are sooo much money and you can only pick from like at the most, 4 of the poses that he took ouf of the 200...its dumb...hmm...oh and then chris came over after work last night and we fought and i cried and we yelled at each other..and then randomly before we knew it we were on the floor....hehehe.... umm...theresa and i are going out in a little while to look for jobs hah...i need a job soo badly...my mom is getting so pissed cause she has to pay for all of my stuff..oh well... later i will have to tell you all where i looked for a job and if i get a job..haha:: Tuesday, June 24, 2003 :: I HATE GUYS:: Monday, June 23, 2003 :: well i went to lake compounce for the day w/ lindsay, ania, amanda and kara...it was fun...lots of roller coasters and water slides heh...it was nice cause it was the first actually hot day of summer....i'm just hoping that i didn't get sunburnt today now cause my senior picture is tomorrow.. lol....oh well now i'm just sitting around watching Meet The Parents and eating ha...i'm gonna go to the store and get a smoothie :) ha just thought you'd all like to know...:: Sunday, June 22, 2003 :: its summer!... i haven't done much..i need a job really bad i'm thinking about Staples in new milford lol cause it will be opening soon and as my mom said "if you get a job there, no one else will knwo what they are doign either since its just opening" so i was like..hmm good idea...lol...last night i had a "me night" hehe..i just watched movies, wrote in my journal, read a book, talked to some guys on the internet..haha...thats about it....today i'm gonna hang out w/chris probably my parents just left....i dont know... thats about it... :)
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